Posted by: John Colby | Tuesday August 9 2011

Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 20, Tuesday 9th August 2011

Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 20, Tuesday 9th August 2011

Previous Instalment

They’re rounding up what they haven’t done.

Geevor – say hello to the people who know us.

St Just for …

SAUSAGE ROLLS!

… dog biscuits and sausage rolls.

And up Chapel Carn Brea. Say hello to the Dartmoor ponies.

We’re a long way from Dartmoor!

They’re clearing the scrub and encouraging grasses.

One of five Dartmoor ponies on duty at Chapel Carn Brea

And you can see for miles. Been very clear this year.

Milleresque - but this time with aircraft on the way to The Isles.

And now onto Mousehole and Newlyn – she’s found two more! We’re on duty.

Security.

And Long Rock again.

Tennis ball!

Wimbledog

Sea!

Chase!

Run!

Knackered again.

Supper!

And then some work.

What have you been doing to those rabbits?

Nothing, precisely nothing.

Why?

Their systems work. CPS works. But what doesn’t work is their security.

So what are you going to do now?

Just watch.

Clever!

And now just wait for morning.

In a burrow.

Rabbit 1: See – it’s working – we know where they are and it’s safe.

Rabbit2: I’ll admit that it’s been better the past couple of days. What have you done?

Rabbit 1: A few minor tweaks.

Rabbit 3: How minor?

Rabbit 1: Quite minor.

Rabbit 3: I’ll give it another day or so.

Rabbit 1: I have confidence in the systems. They won’t let us down!

Rabbit 2: Hope that’s not ‘Famous Last Words!’

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Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 19, Monday 8th August 2011

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Clear night again – saw the Milky Way – and you can stop that joke before you even start it, Sandy!

Shucks!

Rabbits prominent by their absence.

I, too, am lulling them into a false sense of security.

How?

Social engineering.

I’ll leave that to you.

So today, more Chapels,

But in different places.

So to a place just west of Lelant – and meet a very nice lady who shows us round and tells stories of the St Ives Coffin Road that maybe led to a Cholera burial ground.

And then on to a very circuitous tour of St Ives down some very narrow lanes. Don’t blame the SatNav this time, blame the map reader!

And find the one we’d been looking for we’d done a few years back. Then off to Hayle and lunch.

Blagged some!

We both did. Then on to Gwithian, and a tour to find some new ones.

And some almost fluorescent!

Tastes in decor differ ...

Then shopping, then back and on to Long Rock.

Run!

Sea

Sand!

Chase!

Knackered!

Supper!

Bed!

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Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 18, Sunday 7th August 2011

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Wonderful clear sky on our late walk last night. Saw the Milky Way.

We’re not allowed that sort of chocolate.

Hey – that’s my joke – I did it some years ago!

I’m just getting in first.

OK – they came free with my Poetic Licence.

But she’s declared today a no-jokes day.

That only applies to him – not to us.

That’s OK then. … Oh No! What have I just said?

Heh, heh! Thank you for that. Have you heard the one about …

YES!

Or the one about the …

YES! Several times!

How about …

I’ve heard ALL your jokes – several times! They’re just as funny now as they were then – in other words, they’re not!

My talents are just not appreciated.

Talents, maybe, jokes, no.

Right – off. We’re going to see Cape Watersports, assuming it’s still on.

Is that where they have the mile sea swim in from the Brisons?

The Brisons - hosts a large Razorbill colony.

That’s the one.

How will we know if it’s on?

Notices in St Just.

THE CHEESE SHOP!

Not today. They’re just going to get some lunch there. But first, up Chapel Carn Brea

Breezy! And soon to be rainy if that stuff coming in from the Isles is anything to go by.

So we’re going down, into St Just, pick up lunch …

SAUSAGE ROLLS!

… predictable! … and then to Carn Gloose.

Sea off Cape Cornwall - swimming not advised

And it’s cancelled – not really a surprise looking at the sea state. However lunch in the car …

Her taking photos. Him nagging her to take more.

Predictable.

That’s my line!

And back to the van to sit out the rain.

Hey, her pix are very good!

He thinks so as well. That’s why he’s on at her to take more.

The sea at the base of Cape Cornwall

And as we’re on the steering committee tonight some laying about this afternoon wouldn’t come amiss.

Steering committee done. And here’s some more stats.

What?

It takes twice as long to get back from the pub as it does to get to it, and it’s downhill on the way back.

Anything else?

Yes. The motion back from the pub was f(sin(x)+d).

Can you not be more precise?

You were there – their motion back from the pub and you want me to be precise?????

Point taken. So that’s the guide work done for this year.

Not yet – next weekend we’re going to Stoke Gabriel. And she’s requested a meal out.

Do we get overtime for this?

No, but we need to protect them from themselves.

Suppose that we’ll just do it, then.

Yep!

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Posted by: John Colby | Saturday August 6 2011

Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 17, Saturday 6th August 2011

Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 17, Saturday 6th August 2011

Previous Instalment

Good walk this morning – LOADS of smells.

Didn’t notice you going off much after the rabbits.

I’m lulling them into a false sense of security.

I’ve been doing some stats.

Stats? About what?

This holiday. Did you know that by far the largest use of kitchen roll has been them mopping up after they’ve stepped in our water bowl?

Fascinating.

And that the amount of sand we’ve deposited over the back of the car would fill a small bucket?

Must try harder at that.

And that the number of rabbits you haven’t caught …

STOP there – too much information.

And now breakfast.

Sausages!

That’s theirs.

But we’ll get some – not enough, but …

And another statistic about your desire for food  …

If you’d been where I’ve been …

OK, I’ll stop.

They say we’re going to St Ives today. For chapels.

And the news is …?

Look, if they want to drag us round and then have guilt trips for dragging us round so they take us to run in great places, I’ll put up with them dragging us round.

Suppose you’re right – just don’t like the traffic. Or the little kids who think it’s fun to tease dogs. Like those who stroke us, though.

He stops the bad ones pretty quick. For me it’s the kids on site who are just let scream. They tell us off pretty quick for barking, so what’s the difference.

Control. We know our boundaries. And when we stretch or cross them. Was it something from before that you don’t like kids screaming?

Can’t talk about it – maybe one day …

He says there was an idea some time ago that you didn’t instil self-discipline kids because you’d stifle their creativity. He says that of the people he gets you can tell who’s got the self-discipline to listen and get on with their work. And it’s these who’re showing the greatest creativity. These are the ones who he doesn’t see for resits, whatever they are.

Wish he could talk some sense into our neighbours this holiday.

And me. But now he’s finished cooking.

SAUSAGES!

Wait your turn.

Don’t I always?

Yes, you always take your turn in trying to nick mine!

There they go again!

I know you get upset. Their parents never seem to say anything. Are they so insensitive?

According to her, yes.

Ah well, abort St Ives. We’d never get anywhere. Onto Men an Tol. Stone with a hole.

I knew that.

I know you know – it’s just that the people reading this blog may not.

Ha – we’re slow – following this large lime green coach with German number plates.

Not very good with the steering – don’t think he’s been round these parts before.

We’re on the road between Zennor and Pendeen. A very amusing negotiation concering passing in a narrow stretch of road on a narrow bend between the German coach driver and the Italian driver of a large motorhome. Negotiation carried out in partial English with much arm waving.

Passed with millimetres to spare. And now a car has had to go into a field to let him through. We’re letting the car escape from the field.

And finally the coach has drawn into the side of the road to let us pass.

The fun’s not over yet – the open topped double decker round Penwith bus has just passed us in the opposite direction – be fun when they meet. British bus has the advantage of shorter wheelbase and driver with experience of the roads.

And now we’re at Men an Tol – out for a walk.

And she’s spotted another chapel. How unusual. Men an Tol first, though.

Men an Tol - stone with a hole - early Bronze Age, but moved and messed about with since.

Whatever they see in it I know what I see in it – places to go explore!

Now they’re talking to people about the site – and the uncertainty over what it really is.

And how some stones were moved – not many people know that.

Lunch here. We’re in the queue. And being successful.

Poser 1

Poser 2

Now back to the car and off to find that chapel. Fortunately they’ve already bagged that one.

And now we’re off to the cheese shop.

They call it the coffee shop in St Just – it’s that dogs get cheese when they visit.

And they give us their biscuits they get with the coffee. Won’t let us have coffee though.

No telling what you’d do on coffee – you’re hyper enough.

Waiting for him to buy books.

Makes a change from waiting for her to buy books.

And now off to Chapel Carn Brea.

And he’s found someone to talk to – about where his grandfather was stationed during the war. Lots of information being given. Lucky.

And we’ve found some twitchers after Black Kites. People with spotting scopes and path blocking tripods.

You can see the Isles of Scilly again.

I’d noticed. And the rain passing across the bay shimmering in the sunlight.

Hey – it’s me who has renewed their Poetic Licence!

Just prompting.

And now back – supper then bed. Been a long day.

And off out again tomorrow. I could get used to this.

They wish they could get used to this, but sometime they’ll have to get back to work.

Sandy! Using that four letter word on holiday!

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Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 16, Friday 5th August 2011

Previous Instalment

Sunny this morning – not like the forecast.

Make the most of it.

You know, for a campsite never seen so many people in dressing gowns going to the showers.

That wasn’t a cue for Hitchhiker’s Guide jokes, was it?

Well now you mention it …

Grief!

Out for more chapels.

And more.

Been here before – she’s checking up.

More chapels.

Ditto.

Ditto.

Ditto.

Some chapels have attractive old ironwork - this one probably 1857.

Some are more modern - but still executed with flair.

LUNCH!

Stithians Lake. Not bad.

I got some, did you?

Yep!

And now more chapels.

And … you can guess.

And now to the mid point of the South West Coast Path – Porthallow.

Porthallow - known as Pralla - beach - a bit rocky

SatNav wanted to take us somewhere else, but he switched it off.

So now we’re back to her map reading. Will we get back for supper?

Got there – ice cream and a trek along the beach. Not bad.

The Celtic Terrors working as a team.

Sainsburys.

Caravan.

Not a bad day.

Supper.

Sleep.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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Posted by: John Colby | Thursday August 4 2011

Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 15, Thursday 4th August 2011

Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 15, Thursday 4th August 2011

Previous Instalment

Very wet night. He’s been up during the night making sure we didn’t get flooded.

There’s some problems with some tents and caravans. There’s a tipi in the field that’s stayed up OK.

And the rabbits haven’t been washed away. However damp bunny dilutes the taste a bit.

I’ve heard some excuses …

And now we’re going out.

And not changing the subject at all …

And there’s the white large campers – ARRRGGHHH! Different ones – three Italians this time!

Something about “… on the beaches …” springs to mind. Where have I read that before?

And now into Penzance. Pirate time.

And more chapels.

And found some – she’s not leaving any for next year.

Some chapels have quite prosaic uses ...

She will. But she can’t identify some of them – must be long gone.

Some of them are pretty ornate. They must have had some money then.

... but some have been well looked after.

And now lunch.

You’re feeling better, aren’t you?

And now on to some more. Totally crowded so we’re going back to Marazion. She’s going shopping …

So we’re going back with him.

In a certain burrow.

Rabbit 1: They’re coming back early!

Rabbit 3: You’re sure this time?

Rabbit 1: Yes.

Rabbit 2: Right – lookout time.

An hour passes.

Rabbit 3: Absolutely no sign of them.

Rabbit 2: Are you sure of your data?

Rabbit 1: The system picked them up – they should have been there! They’re not now, for certain.

Rabbit 2: Well they aren’t. I’m beginning to get a bit suspicious of your systems.

Rabbit 3: Well we’re going topside. I feel the need for food.

Rabbit 1: We’ll all go. I have faith in my systems!

Rabbit 2: (breathing heavily) I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO FAITH IN YOUR SYSTEMS! Go up and staring me in the face is that brown one with a smug smile! And then turn round …

Rabbit 3: … and the other one’s there!

Rabbit 1: I can’t explain how …

Rabbit 2: And to think we’ve each paid TWO MONTHS lettuce for this.

Rabbit 3: You’d better have an explanation for this … and soon!

Rabbit 1: Well, I … well, I …

Rabbit 3: … SOON!

How did you do that to them?

Easy – just went in and changed the time zone on their machine.

Did you used to work for the News of the World?

Supper!

You must be feeling better

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Posted by: John Colby | Wednesday August 3 2011

Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 14, Wednesday 3rd August 2011

Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 14, Wednesday 3rd August 2011

Previous Instalment

Morning walk. Kerry’s having her usual success with getting our lunch, so we’ll hope they’re taking something extra for us.

They do. And I’m lulling the rabbits into a false sense of security by slowing down.

Ah, yes, well …

OH YES I AM!

So we’d better get out. Hey look …!

In the car park – eleven German campervans all in a row! They have invaded!

Let’s not get into Fawlty Towers mode.

Right – then back – she’s forgotten something.

And off again.

And to Cockwells – a private conservation project – looking very good indeed! This is the fifth year we’ve been here.

And now to Redruth. She’s found some more! Stop and photograph.

Sometimes clues for the locations of chapels are in unusual forms. This one was destroyed by fire in 1975.

And record.

And sometimes the clues are a little more elusive.

And now up to Carn Brea for lunch and a walk.

Looks foggy over St Ives and the west. Could mean rain. Warm,  though.

Huh? Didn’t notice – nose in bracken time. But I know you sometimes sit and look at the distance.

Confuses the rabbits no end.

And more chapels. And Sainsburys, and back.

This conversion to flats (nine of them) at Tuckingmill looks to be very good from the outside.

Pretty heavy rain – what are you doing?

Practicing sleeping.

Another Spike Milligan reference.

Well, we have been seeing the Germans.

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Posted by: John Colby | Tuesday August 2 2011

Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 13, Tuesday 2nd August 2011

Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 13, Tuesday 2nd August 2011

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Sennen today – Farmers’ Market – apparently some different cheese. So off via Long Rock.

Hey – what’s that going into the car park? Three – five – no, eleven large motorhomes all with German registration plates.

We’ve been invaded!

Don’t think so – they don’t have rear gunners.

You’ve been reading too much Spike Milligan!

Anyway, on to Sennen. We can’t go in so one of them stays with us. She’s surveyed and sent him back in with a list of demands shopping list.

And there’s this ripe cheese smell. But we’re not allowed any (yet) and it’s on to Chapel Carn Brea for a run.

They’re slow today.

They had cider last night.

Probably the cause.

Hey, there are the Isles of Scilly! Very clear. You can see for miles!

I’m more concerned finding out what’s under the bracken.

What’s she doing?

We’re at 657ft above sea level. Says so on the marker. She’s on her phone and making notes.

So what’s she doing?

High level research.

Groan! You’ve renewed your Poetic Licence with the free jokes module, haven’t you?

But it was free!

I’ve told you before it was worth what you paid for it!

Now to St Just and then Carn Gloose for lunch

FOOD!

Of course, stomach on legs!

If you’d been where I’ve been …

Point taken. I’m glad that I’ve always know where my next meal was coming from. Was it …

DON’T want to talk about it!

Longships LIght - the lunchtime view

Successful lunch – good flavours there.

Did we leave them any?

Not much – good for their waistlines!

And now where?

Bay of Biscay.

I know their navigation isn’t as good as it could be sometimes, but that’s a bit far!

Apparently a farm – chapel nearby.

Tell me something new!

And now they’ve discounted them. And we’ve gone round in circles. Now we’re going back to Tesco.

Food!

Ahem! Now back via Long Rock and … THE BEACH! WE’VE TURNED OFF!!!

Have patience – there’s a train coming so we’ll have to wait.

BUT IT’S THE BEACH!

OK, train passed, now we can get on.

Hurry up and park so we can get out!

I’m out!

So am I!

Run!

Long Rock Beach - more sand this year that's covered the pebbly berm.

Sea!

Splash!

Run!

Other dogs!

Chase!

Chase!

Soggy!

Soggy!

They don’t mind

Car.

Camp.

Snooze!

Walk.

Rabbits!

You’re not very fast tonight.

Supper!

Stretch!

Where are they going to sit?

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Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 12, Monday 1st August 2011

Previous Instalment

Off bright and early this morning. Wonder where we’re off?

Penzance? Long Rock – turning right – Oh ooohh!

THE V*TS! I DO NOT LIKE THE V*TS!

They probably want to check up on you.

I DO NOT LIKE THE V*TS!

So you said. Now stop trying to crawl into the skirting board.

I DO NOT LIKE THE V*TS!

Now they’re calling us – and he’s having to pick you up.

You aren’t the one getting groped and having a thermometer shoved up your nether regions!

Relax – it’s a checkup – you’ve been off your food.

Notice that you’ve been holding out for some of the chicken they’re feeding me with!

But you’re OK – there’s nothing wrong – just they wanted to make sure.

But I still don’t like the v*ts!

We’re out now. Back to the caravan.

Coverack, they said – check up on a chapel. One that’s been converted.

Pity we can’t go on the beach

But hold on – we are going on the beach!

Sea!

Sea!

Sand!

Sand!

Run!

Run! (bit too quick for the photographer)

Chase!

Chase!

Water!

Water!

Knackered!

Lunch!

Blag some of theirs.

Success!

No change there, then.

Like normal.

And then across to the other side of the harbour and see the chapel.

Via the ice cream shop. Blag some?

Of course.

It’s still there.

Coverack Wesleyan Chapel (1861) undergoing conversion - but seems stalled

It would be – now looks like two flats. Not looking very lived in, though.

She’s taking photos. And now we’re going off road a bit. A new viewpoint.

And more pix.

And now back to the car. Sainsburys, and the van.

Location, Location, Burrow.

Rabbit 2: (breathing hard) That was CLOSE. Nipped into the gorse bush to avoid the brown one and came face to face with the other one. What happened to your early warning system?

Rabbit 1: Nothing showing on the CPS. Don’t know what happened.

Rabbit 3: Well, you’d better find out. And quick.

Rabbit 1: Look, technology isn’t perfect. I’ll go and look again.

Rabbit 2: And make it quick.

That should do it.

What?

Just swapped two numbers of our IDs on their CPS before we went out – and now I’ve swapped them back again so they’ll think it’s a fault on their system. They haven’t been canny enough to keep log files.

So they think we’re not here when we are? Clever.

Yes, you can teach an old dog new tricks.

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Celtic Terrors Summer Holiday Dogblog 2011, 11, Sunday 31st July 2011

Previous Instalment

Bit damp this morning – ground’s still dry, though.

Very British, Kerry, talking about the weather?

But we’ve been lucky so far. Wonder what they’ll do today?

Heard it’s a non-car day – walk.

I’m up for that!

So into Marazion the back way, round the town.

Not village?

Charter market town – says so on the Town Hall.

And then onto the beach. Hey, that sea wall’s new! Ah, it’s those new houses on the top.

Sea Wall at Top Tieb

So if the wall doesn’t hold, then the houses …

Let’s hope they have engineers who’ve heard of explosive decompression. That recessed mortar is a bit iffy.

Well, we’ve heard of it, and we’re not engineers, but I can see your point about the recessed mortar. That’s why harbour walls have smooth faces.

We’re dogs, but that doesn’t stop us recognising things.

Sea walls, old and new

So now where – it’s getting wetter.

Back for lunch, they said.

And now they’re having an afternoon in the warm and dry.

Supper’s early.

It’s Sunday – you know what that means.

Ten minutes there, twenty minutes back – the pub.

And we have to guide them back.

And back – not excessive deviations from the straight.

But plenty of them.

So that’s over for another week.

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