Kerry! Have you heard …?

What, that you’ve discovered a tennis ball mine?

No, much more important …

That the dog biscuits you’ve been burying in the garden have resulted in a tree?

No, even more important …

So what then?

Jo’s got her chair so that she can take Kaiser out!

White woolly Kaiser with the big floppy ears?

Himself – the one we met last month!

When we did that walk?

That one!

Now that is important! So what we did helped!

And thanks to the people who had faith in us and gave what they could.

And lots of others did the same.

And Kaiser can now enjoy himself more.

And Jo gets to be out with him.

I think we’ll call that a result.

Yep. … You sure there isn’t a dog biscuit tree … ?

Kerry …

Yers?

There’s loads of dogs here.

There would be, Sandy, it’s a sponsored dog walk. Honestly!

But what I mean that it’s good that there are. For Kaiser.

Oh – see what you mean. Is that him?

Could be – big, white ,woolly – let’s drag them to say hi and sniff round a bit.

Jo and Kaiser at the start - Kaiser's the big white woolly one.

And the rest of them. Plenty of Springers.

Gundog country.

Wonder if there’ll be any rabbits?

Why don’t I keep my mouth shut? Yes there will be but you’re not going after them.

But I could catch supper for both of us.

After five years trying in Cornwall you think that Staffordshire rabbits are any slower?

Well I … but we’ve got to pose with Kaiser.

Why?

Photographer.

Is this my best side?

Poser!!

But that what you said we had to do.

Grief! Now watch it – we’re being called for the TV camera!

So Kaiser’s famous then – saw him last year. Some award or something.

“Friends for Life” at Crufts. Remember they woke us up to watch.

If they will feed us then give us the sofa to lie on what do they expect? We fall asleep.

Hey – back to it – we’re off soon.

Did you have to do that in such quantity?

Don’t worry, he’s cleared it up.

They’ve got their wristbands.

He looks SO fetching in pink!

Suits him – hey hang on.

And now he’s saying he’s taking it back – not carrying it round.

He’ll catch us up. She’s slower than him.

Lovely Autumn Day

Lovely Autumn day. Hey, don’t believe that she’s slow – this is a cracking pace!

He’s taking photos – he’ll catch us up.

Like the smells round here. Different.

After half a mile

He’s taking his time catching us. Let’s wait for him.

If we both stand she can’t move.

And now he’s putting us on longer leads.

So we can trip her up more.

Good plan.

Still a lovely Autumn day.

Lucky.

A pack of well behaved dogs

Water stop. He carries it round for us.

It’s getting warm. She’s got her coat off. Not bad for mid November.

Hey – what’s that?

Deer.

How much?

And sheep – Jacobs.

Oh – not that kind of dear. Lemme attem!

No, Kerry – leave them alone. Beside we’d never get one in the car to get it home.

Make a change from dog food!

Stomach on legs!

If you’d been where I’ve been …

Point taken.

Still a lovely Autumn day.

There’s a lot of dogs!

And we’re back – and looking to see which photo she wants.

And he’s buying treats for us!

He’s soft like that.

Me first! Me first!

He makes sure we get the same.

But I’m only making sure they’re edible!

Anyway, they said 80 people. And he counted 40 dogs.

So Jo’s a bit closer to getting the wheelchair to take Kaiser out more.

Hope so.

Good day.

Yep. And thanks to all those who’ve sponsored us.

Yes, Jo and Kaiser are now closer to being able to get out independently. And that’s important for both of them

The Celtic Terrors – Dogs Trust rescue dogs – Sandy was born in Scotland, was adopted but the people had to hand her back because they moved. She’s a Labrador, German Shepherd, collie cross. Kerry was a stray from Ireland and when found was “very thin”. She makes up for that now. We think she was chucked out at Christmas 2006. Our vet described her as “Well, there’s collie in there somewhere”.

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Hey – HIS buildings today – no chapels! Just some warehouses in Totnes. Apparently he has some old photos of where we’re going today and wants to see what’s happened to them. He also has memories of coming here as a kid.

Must be dim memories – a long time ago!

Posh warehouses at Totnes - they were rather more tatty fifty years ago.

Then she spotted a shop – and we’re waiting outside with him for HOURS!

It was only fifteen minutes.

Yes, but to him it was HOURS!

Then we walked up Totnes High Street – the higher you went the weirder it got until we were in another country. Think it was the substances rising.

Didn’t like it much.

Me neither. And then they found a bookshop, but both came out disappointed. Then off to Kingsbridge, where they discovered they didn’t have enough change for parking. So on to Frogmore for lunch.

Good brie.

Very good brie, just the right creaminess and liquidity with perfect flavour.

Didn’t get enough of it, though

Me neither.

Beach!

Not very sandy though, difficult to walk on. Says it’s Slapton Sands.

Slapton Shingle more like. We’re not allowed in the water. Too steeply shelving, whatever that means.

Gulls flocking.

There’s a monument here. Must be something to do with that tank at the other end of the beach.

... but some of them never returned.

Hey there’s a lighthouse!

Start Point.

When are they going to finish?

When are you going to get a decent jokes module?

This one’s  OK – get it with my poetic license – and it’s free.

Opinions may differ. And now on again bit narrow. Why doesn’t one of those cars back up to allow the others through?

Just what he’s saying, but with less printable language.

I like this town. What’s the river?

The Dart.

How do you know?

Read the map.

…

Now that was a great walk. And the coffee for them and biscuits for us.

Now we’re going by boat!

Think it’s called a ferry.

Do they live at the end of the garden?

What?

Boats like this.

I’m going to regret this – why?

Because then you’d have ferries at the bottom of the garden.

Grief!

Then Sainsbury’s

Then supper!

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Up early …

For them. I’ve been ready to get to the rabbits for hours.

So all the snores were just window dressing?

I don’t snore!

Hmmmm?? They say you do.

They say you do as well.

Not as bad as them.

Agreed. Now to these rabbits!

…

Missed that one. And that one!

You’re not helping!

Let’s go and get some reliable breakfast.

She’s busy packing.

While he’s out of the way with us.

She wants it that way.

And us in the car while they fold up the awning. They’re having trouble with those zips. That’s twenty minutes she’s spent on that one.

Finally packed and on the way.

He’s stopping. Now what’s he forgotten?

It’s OK, he just wanted to check.

Traffic – we’re not two miles from the site yet.

It’s OK, you can use my bum as a pillow.

I wouldn’t need to if you only took up half the seat!

I have got half, the middle half!

Right – on the A30.

Traffic. To be expected.

But not this much, it’s a bit slow.

We’re turning off on the A38 soon.

We’re not – that’s blocked with an accident, that sign says so.

He’s turning off. Hope he knows where he’s going.

Don’t think he does – he’s working by instinct.

Like we do?

Something like that. … I hope!

Steep hills round here. And through towns. Was that a steam train we passed? We’re not in a time warp are we?

Where did you learn about steam trains?

Puppy School. They also taught us how to be REALLY cute.

And mine did.

Where are we going?

He’s heading to Lostwithiel.

When are they going to find it again?

Uh – oh! Road closed and diversion. Says ‘unsuitable for HGVs’. He’s having to try it, though.

The road’s narrowing.

And getting steeper!

I’m going to shut my eyes. I don’t want to see this!

He’s shut the satnav off. Relying on maps.

She’s shut her eyes as well!

If he does we’re all in deep do-dos!

And now there’s a lorry blocking the path – he’s getting out to look and see if we can get past.

Just!

Don’t know about unsuitable for HGVs – unsuitable for cars more like!

And now we’re in the town – a town with narrow streets.

This turn looks a bit tight. There’s a ditch my side. Traffic will have to stop in both directions before he can get out.

Eventually someone stopped. And now they’re both breathing a bit more easily.

I didn’t know you could get a caravan through such places.

Neither did he!

Lay by. Time to stretch our legs.

Aaaaaahhhhhhh! I needed that!

Aaaaaahhhhhhh! So did I!

And now off again. And over the Tamar.

And through Plymouth.

He’s saying he lived up there, that place we just passed.

And there. And now some miles under us.

And off the A38 to Totnes. And a traffic queue. Thought they’d run out of stock of them by now. And now he’s getting the Satnav annoyed again by taking a different route.

And down another country lane. Into the site.

Good dog walk – plenty of dogs here.

Into Sainsbury to do the shopping. Followed the Satnav and that was down a narrow road with plenty of reversing. Then shopped. And then through Paignton.

Can’t go far – it’s the Regatta and roads are closed. So back to the site.

And now supper!

Usual comment.

…

He’s taking us out for a late night excursion.

What’s that?

RABBIT!

Wonder if they taste the same as Cornish rabbits? But I suppose that would mean catching one.

Harumph!

Better luck next time.

In a Cornish Burrow.

Rabbit 1: Attention South Hams. Alert for brown canine answering to the name of “Kerry, come here!”. Or maybe just “Kerry”. Left Marazion en route for you.

South Hams Rabbit: We have just experienced said animal – what took you so long to alert us?

Rabbit 1: They were stuck in a traffic jam. Didn’t think they’d be up to you yet.

South Hams Rabbit: Well they are. If you have any more alerts could you please make them more timely and we’ll be able to make use of them.

Rabbit 2: You’ve done it again haven’t you?

Rabbit 3: Looks like it. You’d better have it fixed for next year.

Rabbit 1: You think they’ll be coming here again?

Rabbit 3: They’ve booked.

Rabbit 1: So you’d better renew your subscription …

Rabbit 2: After this year, you want MORE lettuce.

Rabbit 1: I have to keep the system going. Can’t do it without people buying it.

Rabbit 3: What do you think your name is, Bill Gates?

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Last full day down here today – so she needs to do some shopping.

Bet it’s books.

Undoubtedly. We’re used to sitting outside bookshops with one or the other of them.

And not only books – that’s a jewellers we’ve now been to.

She’s looking pleased.

And now lunch – and off to Carn Gloose where the mist invaded.

Then up Chapel Carn Brea, say goodbye to the rabbits up there.

One day …

You say that every year.

Relaxing, they call it ...

And finally back – and they’re packing – we’re staying out of the way.

We’re moving off tomorrow to another site – don’t know if we’ll have woof-fi access there.

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They fell for it! They fell for it!

I noticed – you were expecting that weren’t you? I could tell by the way you took off.

Yep – one tweak and one message was all it took.

What were they?

Message was that we had no hope of catching them, tweak was me switching off CPS.

When you took off after them I had a job keeping up.

I can move fast enough! But we still didn’t catch them.

You know those shops all over the place – called “Co-operative Food”?

Yes.

I’ve decided bunnies are “uncooperative food”.

Thought it was my jokes module?

The one I paid for is better.

…

So off for more chapels. Oh oh! They’re finding more!

Small clues are often all you get

I’ve said it before, I hope they save some for next year. Or do they grow when we’re not around?

Don’t know. I think he’s convinced they are growing! She calls it research.

And now lunch – Porthustock. And a relaxing time on the beach. Bit breezy, though.

A sight not often seen, thankfully - knees

Back to Sainsbury’s and find a large traffic jam. And emergency services. So off on a jaunt round the nether reaches of Helston to get back. Then supper and bed.

In a burrow.

Rabbit 2: This famous – ahem – CPS of yours. What happened to it this morning?

Rabbit 1: It suffered an outage – not much I can do about external systems.

Rabbit 3: But so very convenient for them that the outage was precisely when they were about? And problematic for us?

Rabbit 1: As I said, external systems.

Rabbit 2: So who precisely controls the CPS? Someone you can complain to? Because it was very close this morning.

Rabbit 1: It says it’s Kay 9 Systems Limited.

Rabbit 3: And that hasn’t made you suspicious?

Rabbit 1: Err, no. Should it?

Rabbit 2: Read it. Out loud.

Rabbit 1: Kay Nine – errr – you may have a point.

Rabbit 3: A very good point. All this time you’ve been relying on something controlled by THEM??? I WANT MY LETTUCE BACK!

Rabbit 2: And mine!!!

Rabbit 1: Well – errr – I’ve eaten it – can do you a refund in grass, though.

Rabbit 2: You mean the stuff that’s growing free?

Rabbit 1: That’s the stuff.

Rabbit 3: You owe us – BIG TIME!

Rabbit 2: And that’s from me as well – BIG TIME!

Rabbit 1: It’s a good job they’re going in a couple of days.

Rabbit 2: Yes, isn’t it – and convenient! Let’s just not have any more slips ups. Shall we?

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They’re rounding up what they haven’t done.

Geevor – say hello to the people who know us.

St Just for …

SAUSAGE ROLLS!

… dog biscuits and sausage rolls.

And up Chapel Carn Brea. Say hello to the Dartmoor ponies.

We’re a long way from Dartmoor!

They’re clearing the scrub and encouraging grasses.

One of five Dartmoor ponies on duty at Chapel Carn Brea

And you can see for miles. Been very clear this year.

Milleresque - but this time with aircraft on the way to The Isles.

And now onto Mousehole and Newlyn – she’s found two more! We’re on duty.

Security.

And Long Rock again.

Tennis ball!

Wimbledog

Sea!

Chase!

Run!

Knackered again.

Supper!

And then some work.

What have you been doing to those rabbits?

Nothing, precisely nothing.

Why?

Their systems work. CPS works. But what doesn’t work is their security.

So what are you going to do now?

Just watch.

Clever!

And now just wait for morning.

…

In a burrow.

Rabbit 1: See – it’s working – we know where they are and it’s safe.

Rabbit2: I’ll admit that it’s been better the past couple of days. What have you done?

Rabbit 1: A few minor tweaks.

Rabbit 3: How minor?

Rabbit 1: Quite minor.

Rabbit 3: I’ll give it another day or so.

Rabbit 1: I have confidence in the systems. They won’t let us down!

Rabbit 2: Hope that’s not ‘Famous Last Words!’

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Clear night again – saw the Milky Way – and you can stop that joke before you even start it, Sandy!

Shucks!

Rabbits prominent by their absence.

I, too, am lulling them into a false sense of security.

How?

Social engineering.

I’ll leave that to you.

So today, more Chapels,

But in different places.

So to a place just west of Lelant – and meet a very nice lady who shows us round and tells stories of the St Ives Coffin Road that maybe led to a Cholera burial ground.

And then on to a very circuitous tour of St Ives down some very narrow lanes. Don’t blame the SatNav this time, blame the map reader!

And find the one we’d been looking for we’d done a few years back. Then off to Hayle and lunch.

Blagged some!

We both did. Then on to Gwithian, and a tour to find some new ones.

And some almost fluorescent!

Tastes in decor differ ...

Then shopping, then back and on to Long Rock.

Run!

Sea

Sand!

Chase!

Knackered!

Supper!

Bed!

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Wonderful clear sky on our late walk last night. Saw the Milky Way.

We’re not allowed that sort of chocolate.

Hey – that’s my joke – I did it some years ago!

I’m just getting in first.

OK – they came free with my Poetic Licence.

But she’s declared today a no-jokes day.

That only applies to him – not to us.

That’s OK then. … Oh No! What have I just said?

Heh, heh! Thank you for that. Have you heard the one about …

YES!

Or the one about the …

YES! Several times!

How about …

I’ve heard ALL your jokes – several times! They’re just as funny now as they were then – in other words, they’re not!

My talents are just not appreciated.

Talents, maybe, jokes, no.

Right – off. We’re going to see Cape Watersports, assuming it’s still on.

Is that where they have the mile sea swim in from the Brisons?

The Brisons - hosts a large Razorbill colony.

That’s the one.

How will we know if it’s on?

Notices in St Just.

THE CHEESE SHOP!

Not today. They’re just going to get some lunch there. But first, up Chapel Carn Brea

Breezy! And soon to be rainy if that stuff coming in from the Isles is anything to go by.

So we’re going down, into St Just, pick up lunch …

SAUSAGE ROLLS!

… predictable! … and then to Carn Gloose.

Sea off Cape Cornwall - swimming not advised

And it’s cancelled – not really a surprise looking at the sea state. However lunch in the car …

Her taking photos. Him nagging her to take more.

Predictable.

That’s my line!

And back to the van to sit out the rain.

Hey, her pix are very good!

He thinks so as well. That’s why he’s on at her to take more.

The sea at the base of Cape Cornwall

And as we’re on the steering committee tonight some laying about this afternoon wouldn’t come amiss.

…

Steering committee done. And here’s some more stats.

What?

It takes twice as long to get back from the pub as it does to get to it, and it’s downhill on the way back.

Anything else?

Yes. The motion back from the pub was f(sin(x)+d).

Can you not be more precise?

You were there – their motion back from the pub and you want me to be precise?????

Point taken. So that’s the guide work done for this year.

Not yet – next weekend we’re going to Stoke Gabriel. And she’s requested a meal out.

Do we get overtime for this?

No, but we need to protect them from themselves.

Suppose that we’ll just do it, then.

Yep!

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Good walk this morning – LOADS of smells.

Didn’t notice you going off much after the rabbits.

I’m lulling them into a false sense of security.

I’ve been doing some stats.

Stats? About what?

This holiday. Did you know that by far the largest use of kitchen roll has been them mopping up after they’ve stepped in our water bowl?

Fascinating.

And that the amount of sand we’ve deposited over the back of the car would fill a small bucket?

Must try harder at that.

And that the number of rabbits you haven’t caught …

STOP there – too much information.

And now breakfast.

Sausages!

That’s theirs.

But we’ll get some – not enough, but …

And another statistic about your desire for food  …

If you’d been where I’ve been …

OK, I’ll stop.

They say we’re going to St Ives today. For chapels.

And the news is …?

Look, if they want to drag us round and then have guilt trips for dragging us round so they take us to run in great places, I’ll put up with them dragging us round.

Suppose you’re right – just don’t like the traffic. Or the little kids who think it’s fun to tease dogs. Like those who stroke us, though.

He stops the bad ones pretty quick. For me it’s the kids on site who are just let scream. They tell us off pretty quick for barking, so what’s the difference.

Control. We know our boundaries. And when we stretch or cross them. Was it something from before that you don’t like kids screaming?

Can’t talk about it – maybe one day …

He says there was an idea some time ago that you didn’t instil self-discipline kids because you’d stifle their creativity. He says that of the people he gets you can tell who’s got the self-discipline to listen and get on with their work. And it’s these who’re showing the greatest creativity. These are the ones who he doesn’t see for resits, whatever they are.

Wish he could talk some sense into our neighbours this holiday.

And me. But now he’s finished cooking.

SAUSAGES!

Wait your turn.

Don’t I always?

Yes, you always take your turn in trying to nick mine!

There they go again!

I know you get upset. Their parents never seem to say anything. Are they so insensitive?

According to her, yes.

…

Ah well, abort St Ives. We’d never get anywhere. Onto Men an Tol. Stone with a hole.

I knew that.

I know you know – it’s just that the people reading this blog may not.

Ha – we’re slow – following this large lime green coach with German number plates.

Not very good with the steering – don’t think he’s been round these parts before.

We’re on the road between Zennor and Pendeen. A very amusing negotiation concering passing in a narrow stretch of road on a narrow bend between the German coach driver and the Italian driver of a large motorhome. Negotiation carried out in partial English with much arm waving.

Passed with millimetres to spare. And now a car has had to go into a field to let him through. We’re letting the car escape from the field.

And finally the coach has drawn into the side of the road to let us pass.

The fun’s not over yet – the open topped double decker round Penwith bus has just passed us in the opposite direction – be fun when they meet. British bus has the advantage of shorter wheelbase and driver with experience of the roads.

And now we’re at Men an Tol – out for a walk.

And she’s spotted another chapel. How unusual. Men an Tol first, though.

Men an Tol - stone with a hole - early Bronze Age, but moved and messed about with since.

Whatever they see in it I know what I see in it – places to go explore!

Now they’re talking to people about the site – and the uncertainty over what it really is.

And how some stones were moved – not many people know that.

Lunch here. We’re in the queue. And being successful.

Poser 1

Poser 2

Now back to the car and off to find that chapel. Fortunately they’ve already bagged that one.

And now we’re off to the cheese shop.

They call it the coffee shop in St Just – it’s that dogs get cheese when they visit.

And they give us their biscuits they get with the coffee. Won’t let us have coffee though.

No telling what you’d do on coffee – you’re hyper enough.

Waiting for him to buy books.

Makes a change from waiting for her to buy books.

And now off to Chapel Carn Brea.

And he’s found someone to talk to – about where his grandfather was stationed during the war. Lots of information being given. Lucky.

And we’ve found some twitchers after Black Kites. People with spotting scopes and path blocking tripods.

You can see the Isles of Scilly again.

I’d noticed. And the rain passing across the bay shimmering in the sunlight.

Hey – it’s me who has renewed their Poetic Licence!

Just prompting.

And now back – supper then bed. Been a long day.

And off out again tomorrow. I could get used to this.

They wish they could get used to this, but sometime they’ll have to get back to work.

Sandy! Using that four letter word on holiday!

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